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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26126212">Everyone knows gays can’t drive!</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/'>Anonymous</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>One Direction (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Ambiguous/Open Ending, Bad Driving, M/M, Ridiculous Flirting</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 03:42:21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,715</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26126212</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“Well I didn’t mean to! It’s not my fault I’m a bad driver!”</p>
<p>Louis arches both brows and blinks twice. “How the hell is it not your fault you’re a <i>terrible</i> driver?”</p>
<p>“Because I’m <i>gay!</i> Everyone knows gays can’t drive!” </p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>58</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Anonymous</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Everyone knows gays can’t drive!</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Louis is minding his own business, driving down the highway with his cruise control set at a comfortable 78, just fast enough to not annoy himself but still slow enough he could tap the brakes to slow down closer to the speed limit if he spots a cop. He admires the lightly sprinkling rain on his windshield and the vibrant green the grass and trees have turned to with the spring showers they’ve had in the past few weeks. His exit is coming up quickly, the small cluster of cars that surround him switching lanes recklessly and passing each other as he sits up straighter and prepares to slide onto the exit ramp. </p>
<p>The solid line on the side turns to a dashed line and just as he’s flicking on his turn signal, the car just ahead of him in the far lane jerks across both lanes to barely make the exit, cutting Louis off and nearly causing what would have been a pretty significant accident. He hits his brakes just hard enough to not make contact with the car now directly in front of him, both hands gripping the wheel tightly. The second he’s confident things are alright, he throws his hand up and flips the driver off as visibly and aggressively as he can through his windshield, muttering to himself about idiots and people who shouldn’t have their license. </p>
<p>The car in front of him sways side to side along the ramp until they come to the stop sign at the main road, heading toward the right turn lane at first but cutting Louis off a second time at the last minute to merge into the left turn lane. </p>
<p>“What the <em>fuck</em>, dude,” he says sharply. The main road is clear both ways, Louis can clearly see far enough each way to tell the cars are still far enough away to safely and politely make the turn and continue driving. Rather than speeding off and racing wildly down the street like Louis thought they would, the car in front of him just waits. And waits. And waits. He can see that the person driving has their head tilted down like they’re looking at their phone and he only has so much patience, most of which had been used up in the crowded grocery store and waiting in line at Starbucks. </p>
<p>So many cars have passed by them that Louis has lost count, and the disturbing part is that the amount of cars actually out today is quite limited. He finally gives in to his frustration and honks twice in quick succession. The driver pops his head up and stares at him through his side mirror a few beats too long before finally looking both ways and calmly navigating onto the main road. Louis huffs an annoyed breath and makes his turn, hoping that’ll be it and they’ll be on their way. </p>
<p>Not more than two minutes down the road, Louis slowly closes in on the driver again, slowing down to keep space between them. He double checks his speed and notices they’re going a full ten miles per hour under the speed limit and no one is in front of them to cause the delay. He can’t even pass them with the small dips and hills the road travels along. He groans out loud and adjusts his hold on the wheel with one hand, propping his opposite elbow on the door and resting his head on his fist. He truly tries to not get too close but he’s annoyed and his road rage is not great on his best days, so he ends up a little closer than most people would find comfortable just to maybe give the other person something to annoy them in return. </p>
<p>As they make their way into the small town, the single lane stretches wider to allow two lanes each way. Once he’s confident in which lane the driver in front of him is choosing, he quickly shifts into the other and hopes to make the upcoming light to just get away from them and make it home sooner. Of course, as soon as the thought crosses his mind, the green light changes to yellow and again to red, forcing him to slow to a stop right next to the driver that’s been giving him grief for the past ten minutes. </p>
<p>He stares straight ahead for as long as possible but his curiosity gets the best of him and he glances to the side to find the other person already staring at him. The guy has a wide frown set on his face that makes him look a bit like a frog, his curly hair brushing just under his chin and a tiny half-bun tied on the top of his head that brushes the ceiling of his car when he shifts in his seat. Louis rolls his eyes at the obnoxious Ray Bans on his face and starts to turn to face forward again but movement catches his eye. The guy is rolling his window down, staring determinedly at him. Louis arches a brow and stares back. </p>
<p>When the window is down all the way, the guy leans on his center console and Louis can see his mouth move. The light turns green and Louis flips him off again before taking off down the road. He’s going just a bit too fast down the main drag, hoping to beat the last light in town before his turn, but it seems luck just isn’t on his side today. The light changes just as quickly as the first one, Louis braking hard and sighing to himself. </p>
<p>The same guy pulls up next to him again, the window still rolled down, and leans over his console. Louis has had just about enough of this. He rolls his own window down and sucks in a deep breath, ready to tell his guy to fuck off for the last time. </p>
<p>“Hey!” Louis snaps his mouth shut before he can even make a sound. The man’s deep voice rolls over the sound of light traffic and their idling cars. “Thanks for riding my ass back there,” he says sarcastically. “Don’t you think you were a little close?” </p>
<p><em>“Me?”</em> Louis shouts. “Uh, you cut me off, asshole. <em>Twice!”</em> </p>
<p>The guy’s mouth drops open and Louis can barely hear him huff an affronted breath. “Nuh uh!”</p>
<p>“Nuh uh? Are you twelve? You definitely cut me off, man.”</p>
<p>“Well I didn’t mean to! It’s not my fault I’m a bad driver!”</p>
<p>Louis arches both brows and blinks twice. “How the hell is it not your fault you’re a <em>terrible</em> driver?”</p>
<p>“Because I’m <em>gay!</em> Everyone knows gays can’t drive!” </p>
<p>“What? That’s no excuse! I’m gay and I’m not putting people’s lives in danger getting off the highway.” </p>
<p>“Oh,” the guy pauses and shifts closer to his open window, his seatbelt straining against his chest. “Can I have your number?” </p>
<p>“What?” Before he can think of anything else to say, a car behind them honks, bringing their attention back to the light that has turned green again. </p>
<p>“Pull over up there!” the man shouts then speeds off, cutting Louis off again and slowing down in front of him with his turn signal on. <em>What the fuck,</em> Louis thinks. </p>
<p>They turn onto a side street and pull off to the shoulder. Louis leaves his car on and stays put. The other guy gets out of his car and walks over to his open window, Louis admiring his long, lean legs as he saunters toward him. He leans down and rests his folded arms on Louis’s door, pushing his sunglasses on top of his head and leaning down.</p>
<p>“Hey,” he says with an admittedly charming smile. </p>
<p>“Hello.” The guy just keeps grinning and Louis raises his eyebrows again. </p>
<p>“So can I have your number?” </p>
<p>Louis laughs and shakes his head, looking around to see if anyone’s watching their strange exchange. </p>
<p>“Why should I give you my number? I don’t even know your name.” He may or may not glance down enough for his eyelashes to brush against his cheeks, then look up at him through them. </p>
<p>His grin widens into a beaming smile, his face resembling his froggy frown from before. “I’m Harry.” </p>
<p>“Well, Harry. I still don’t see why I should give you my number, especially after you almost killed me a few minutes ago.” </p>
<p>“You’re feisty. I like it.” </p>
<p>“Okay? Is this how you get all the guys? Threaten their lives and force them into pulling to the side of the road so you can catwalk up to their window?”</p>
<p>Harry laughs, throwing his head back. He bites his lip as he meets Louis’s eyes again, a massive dimple carving out a large portion of his face. </p>
<p>“I’ve actually never done anything like this.” Louis rolls his eyes and shifts in his seat, looking up and down the street again. “Honestly,” Harry says. “No one has ever called me on my bullshit like that before. When I use the gay driving excuse, people are usually too uncomfortable to say anything else and I go on my way.” </p>
<p>“So you’re always this bad at driving? Doesn’t really make me want to get to know you better,” he teases. </p>
<p>Harry barrels right over him. “I didn’t really mean to yell at you to give me your number. I was just shocked by how you responded and I think you’re really handsome and I’d like to take you to dinner. Please,” he tacks on the end, smiling wide enough to pop his dimple again. Louis hates that it’s working on him. </p>
<p>“You don’t even know me.”</p>
<p>“Yeah, but I want to.” </p>
<p>Louis smiles down at his steering wheel and rolls his eyes at himself. “What a line,” he murmurs.</p>
<p>“What’s your name?”</p>
<p>“Louis.”</p>
<p>“Louis,” Harry says like he’s testing it out, deciding if he likes the taste of it on his tongue. He smiles brilliantly at him again and Louis knows he’s going to say yes. “So Louis, what do you say? Can I have your number?” </p>
<p>He sighs heavily, exaggeratedly, and reaches for his phone. “Alright, but I’m definitely driving us to dinner and you’re definitely paying for our meals.” </p>
<p>Harry chuckles, grabbing his own phone out of his pocket. “Deal.” </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Fully 100% understand and agree that this situation in real life is creepy as hell and super not okay. Please do not ever do this to someone.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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